Welcome to Episode 20 with our special guests number one best selling author, high performance psychologist, Dr. Elena Estanol.  As an Intuitive business mentor and spiritual guide, Elena has been up leveling speakers, performers, athletes, coaches and purpose based Entrepreneurs to become extraordinary beings and legendary leaders for over 16 years. She was certified in several energy healing modalities, performance, psychology, movement, business and coaching her unique system "in flow and on fire" unlocks and unleashes your unlimited potential for you to take courageous action to defy the ordinary and become extraordinary in business and in life. Her unique system aligns mind, body, soul and spirit to manifest her clients visions, and build profitable and transformational businesses that changed the world. So without further ado, it is my pleasure to introduce you to Elena Estanol.  Welcome, Elena.

It's such a pleasure to be here with you, Moira, thank you so much for the invitation.

It's really cool.

Thank you. And I feel like we're soul sisters, I have a lot of people like that, that come on, that I feel very connected to. And we met many, many years ago, about five years ago. And I've always watched what you've been doing and I am really impressed with the work that you do in the world and who you serve.

Thank you, I appreciate that. Yeah, I remember being on that summit with you. Yeah, and listening to your recording, and just being so inspired and impressed with the work that you do as well. So I felt exactly that same connection.

And we both had the same, I get into this with talking to you today. But we both have this mission as part of the show to raise the consciousness of each person from like the healing of humanity and, and Mother Earth. So we're both on the same page and the more lightworkers and people who are doing this, and people who want to step into this, again, we'll get into that today as a business model. You know, that's how we're going to bring our light out into the world.

Totally.

So let's just jump in there. So how does someone discover what they are meant to be doing in the world, their unique gifts, their talents and how do they create their own personal vision and their unique blueprint for success?

Wow, big question.

Yes, such a little chunker. And that's what I think you know, and then I think when I asked it, I'm okay with it. But I know it's a lot in there. So really, where did they start to discover what they're meant to do? A lot of people say, I don't know what my purpose is. I don't know what my gifts are. They don't know what how do you create addition. And they don't even know that there is a unique blueprint. So we can leave the unique blueprint beginning to how do they start to discover their work their unique gifts, so they can bring that out into the world.  Perfect with the time right now, with all the upheaval with a pandemic in the last year and the racial, you know, all those challenges. But yeah, like you said, that we're in the darkness of the soul. But now we're coming out into the life. And, and there's so many, I believe there's a gift in every moment, and every challenge, and there was huge gifts in this year, if people would just go inside and be quiet. And not all that chatter that we have rushing about. People could stay at home and work, they didn't have to get in a car traffic, you know, spending time with your family, even if it was, like you said, challenging for some people who have like young children at home and trying to work that there is a gift in every moment.

100% and I feel like, you know, this is part of what we need to be reminded of, because often, we'll forget it right, like, we'll get so stuck in holding on to things as they were, and I feel like this year has been a great experience of that, you know, some people have had really, really challenging years and a lot of hardship. And other people have said this has been one of the best years. And really, that the differences in the experience has been the way in which we have responded to the situation, the mindset by which we have approached things. And you know, I find that that the more that we resist, what shows up in our lives, the more we suffer, the more episodes, right, yeah, we resist persists that what we and, you know, there's this Buddhist saying about pain is certain and, like pain is mandatory, but suffering is optional.

Yes. Beautiful.

And, you know, I've heard this, I mean, this is a very common saying for many years, you know, and I always was kind of baffled by it. And I feel like I had an opportunity, especially, you know, not this year, but the year before, to really, to really understand what that meant, in terms of, you know, pain, pain is going to show up, like we cannot avoid pain, right? Like life, it's going to provide all kinds of opportunities and experiences, some of them are joyful, some of them painful, but the suffering is a part that we can control. Because that is a part that has to do with how we are responding to what is showing up in our lives. And that the more that we resist things, and more that we fight against things, the more resistance we're creating, and the more pain that we're creating, you know, and so, so I feel like this, what is happening in the world right now, you know, and I'm going to say something that it's going to be a little bit controversial.  In that, you know, I'm not saying that, I think that the world, it's great the way that it is, because there's a lot of things are a problem, clearly, and we're seeing that. And what I believe is that everything that is happening, and everything that's showing up is exactly what needs to be happening. 

Yes, it has, things need to break down before we can give room and make wave for the new and I love creating that space. Right? Exactly. When we logged in there, you can't create that space for the new era and new way of being.

Exactly and so I'm gonna, I'm gonna bring it a little bit to the more personal and then I'll expand it more into the global.  I often tell my clients that baggage is all of the unresolved emotion that we experience that we tend to stuff down and push away, right so anytime that we the easiest way to create baggage is you know, have a you know, have a traumatic or painful experience and then don't experience it don't process it. just stuff it down. And then all of that gets stored in your body as these little black bags and and it stays there and often when we are finally in a place where like we're gonna go do this thing. We're gonna move forward and then these little black bags rise up to the surface. And then all of a sudden is like, Oh my gosh, but who am I to do the thing? And I don't deserve this. And I, you know, I am not worthy of love. I'm not right. Like, we think that we want these things and all of a sudden they show up and then we have all of this baggage shows up. And and then we, and then we beat ourselves up about like, why is this showing up. And to me, it's like, No, I think that we need to celebrate when baggage comes up, because it means that your unconscious mind is telling you that you are finally ready to release it, you're finally like have the tools to be able to release it, you have the support to be able to deal with it, like it's coming up so that you can actually look at it, heal it and resolve it. And so in some ways, I try to teach my clients to celebrate when baggage comes up, because then it means like, they're finally ready to, like look at it honestly, and to figure out a way to release it and let it go and then actually move towards what they want to create. And so if we extrapolate that to what's happening in the world, you know, that all of these things that have been happening, you know, racism and sexism and the environment, like all of the problems that we are facing, are things that we have kind of stuff down, you know, they're kind of things like, oh, we're not going to talk about that live, let's just push it down, oh, we're gonna just kind of hide this. And all of a sudden, it's like, gotten to places that we can no longer hide any of this stuff. Like it needs to come up. And we need to learn how to deal with it. We need to learn how to have the conversations, we need to learn to heal it within ourselves so that we can, you know, begin to heal together and then create a different paradigm.

Mm hmm.

So let's talk about healing in that because this was you, you've experienced it, I've experienced it. I think everyone at one time is experienced the I am not enough syndrome, or the unworthiness and you know, not enough with, you know, I'm not smart enough, I'm not tall enough, I'm not skinny enough, whatever, then not enough is that we play out versus we are just more than enough. And you came a long time ago when I was researching not a long time ago, you went through an eating disorders. So I wanted you just to share how did you heal that part in your life? And how did you heal around your own self love or any failure that you had in your life? How did you go about healing that?

Yeah, um, so, you know, I'm going to tie this to your first question about, we just need to look at our lives, to be able to start figuring out what the next step is. And so before I go into that, I just want to finish a part of that last question that you did about like purpose. And that, I don't believe necessarily that, well, I believe that we have kind of a bigger purpose, but how that gets expressed, can change throughout our lives on our life will usually be leading us towards that path. And so I feel like sometimes we put a lot of pressure to be able to figure out what it is that we need to do, and that we need to stay in that path. And the reality of it is that we might actually be simply being shown the stepping stones, that is moving us towards that path, if that makes sense, you know, so. So when we look at our life experience, when we look at what we struggle with, that might be the greatest place for us to be able to start figuring out like, this is one of the steps to moving me towards my path. So for me is I struggled for many, many years with an eating disorder, it almost took my life. And because he was so severe, and I had this, I had this moment of really wishing that I was dead. So I was never actively trying to kill myself, per se, but in some ways an eating disorder is a passive way to, you know, try to eradicate your life. And so I was sort of in this place of like, on my life doesn't matter, I can't really make a difference in the world, like, it doesn't matter. And just being willing to kind of lay my life down. You know, and I had this I don't know, like this conversation with spirit, you know, where I was basically set where they basically said, like, it's your choice. You know, they weren't like, don't do blah, blah, it was like, it's your choice. And if you're actually willing to lay your life down, why don't you just give your life into something and into other people and into, you know, and so it was an interesting proposition. And I realized, like, okay, like I have experienced the suffering, and I don't want other people to be experiencing this kind of suffering. And so part of my motivation started actually simply to be able to help other people. Not be in the same dark hole that I was in, like totally, totally. Right. 

So, if I was going to give my life away, like because I was willing to lay down, then why couldn't I just decide that I was going to give my life into something bigger than me. And so, but I had this very good understanding that I wasn't going to be able to help anybody else. If I didn't do my work, you know, that I needed to heal myself first, in order for me to be able to heal others, because even though and so even though the motivation for me to do it was to help others, I recognized that I needed to do my own work. And there is a huge part of this. And I still talk a lot about self love. And even in the context of relationships. And even in the bigger context, I believe that one of the biggest things that we need to learn to do is to really love ourselves fully and unconditionally, to have lots of compassion and grace for ourselves. Because it was actually during the time with my eating disorder that I recognized how what we, how we treat ourselves is what is reflected in how we treat others. And so I'm going to give you an example. So one of the biggest things with an eating disorder is that you're constantly criticizing your body, you're constantly criticizing the your food. And consequently, you are constantly criticizing what other people are eating, you're constantly criticizing what other people's bodies look like. And you might not say it out loud. But this is exactly what's happening. You know, like you're, it's, it's this constant looking for all of the things that are wrong with you. And it's constantly looking for all the things that are wrong with the people around you, on the world around you. And so it was fascinating for me to recognize that as I began to start working and healing in terms of being able to have more grace and more compassion for myself to recognize that I wasn't perfect, and I was never going to be perfect. And that was okay. That I could be worthy of love and belonging, regardless of you know, what my body looked like, or what I was eating, or not eating what I was saying or not saying, and having more understanding more grace and compassion, I was able to start having more grace and compassion for other people. You know, most of my friends and my clients often say, like, you know, I often I can say anything with you. And I'm like, Yeah, because I either have gone through it, or I have done it or, you know, so I'm like, I, I'm not going to be one that's going to be judgmental, right, like, I'm going to be understanding because, in some ways, I've walked the path. And I've recognized that it's not easy, and that we all make mistakes, and that we all do our best. And we often fall into that, and behaviors or bad patterns, not because we not in a conscious way, but because we are trying to satisfy the need. And we don't have the tools to satisfy that need in a different way.

It's when you share that you've either gone down that path, or you're in the path or whatever, because one thing I had to become conscious, I chose to become conscious of when I was doing healing work. And I have a long history of doing healing work and coaching and consulting, but the healing work area that I used to say, and I didn't realize that even even if we don't listen to herself, if we're not conscious that, ah, for me to help that person, I felt I had to go through what they were going through. And then somebody said it to me one day, and it just hit me on the head like what? And then I realized it was saying that that no, no, no, I don't have to go through that. Now, like you said, we possibly have gone through some different areas. And that's why we get excited that we want to help other people with something that we've come through, you know, totally!  Story and t yeah, I just want to put that out there. 

Yeah, I think it's great and I don't believe that you need to go through - no ~Just to be you know, just to emphasize your point. I think it's a fantastic point. I don't believe that you need to go through my experience of things, it's more more so like, whatever I've gone through and whatever wisdom that I've had, and that somehow then I will just attract the clients that need that perspective and that help, you know, so really, it's about I then gain whatever tools experience for people that needed and that you know, I always kind of believe that people that are that are meant to work with will find me and, and I believe this in relationships, there's this beautiful quote, it's a Chinese proverb that says a fine red line connects all those who are meant to meet regardless of time, place and circumstance. That threat may stretch or tangle but it will never break.

Yes, that's beautiful.

It's a beautiful proverb. I really truly believe it in terms of, we don't need to go try to find or search, I truly believe that when we are in alignment with our truth in terms of what it is that we have experienced, and what it is that we have here to give to the world, that those people will find you, and they will be magnetized to you. And, and people that are not in resonance with you just won't, you know, and so in some ways it you know, we cannot help everybody. And this is the beauty of why, you know, it's so great to collaborate with so many other healers and practitioners and because everybody, because there's, we all need to have support at one time or another, and one person can't do it all. But if we kind of link arms, and we create this matrix of people that are committed to show up in service of humanity, then whoever needs your support that resonates with you, with your message with your energy with the way that you talk about it, then those are the people that you're meant to work with. And those that aren't then ~ Namaste ~ that's great too, they will find you know, they

will find somebody else that they will resonate with. And and this is the beauty of life.

I know that in Michael Gerber's, I interviewed him many years ago on a television show. And he talks about how entrepreneurs are trying to wear all these hats, right? Not just that hat. And, you know, that's a challenge.  I was there, once you know the, that many entrepreneurs, they they're trying to be all to everyone and I can serve that person and that person versus becoming really crystal clear on their niche, and what they do, who they serve, how they serve, and the specific transformation that they they offer and their clients experience? How would you tell somebody that in business, how do they find their niche? And then of course, they create the story and pick the story that fits with the work they want to do? There's my little chunking again, but it's in there, you can handle that.

Yeah, well you know, I have a very different perspective on this, because I am somebody that has been interested in many things throughout life. And so to me, it's like, start with where you're at, you know, so, like, I started with my experience, having experienced an eating disorder, and I was like, I want to help people that are struggling eating disorder, and I did that work for many years. And then, you know, got to a point where I was like, that's no longer my soul's calling. And, you know, I really felt like I really needed to work with people with ADHD, I have ADHD, and I have a high performance coach. And I felt like, you know, often people with ADHD, and entrepreneurs with ADHD, have, like, lots of struggles in terms of like, how to be productive. And, and so it was, like, I want to do more of that work. So I started doing more of that. And then, you know, as I've gone through many of the challenges with, you know, losing my primary relationship and, and having health challenges, you know, I've kind of been like, Okay, I need to be able to help people, women navigate interpersonal relationships, help people learn how to show up, no learn, teach people how to connect to their intuition. So they're making great decisions. And so to me, I feel like we're constantly evolving. And so to be able to say, like, Okay, well, you need to pick your niche, and then you need to do that, you know, to me, it's like, that's a great place to start. Because we need to pick one place, we need to pick a door where we start that and then we also need to be constantly in connection with ourselves, and listening to our intuition and listening to what is the next evolution. And then next iteration of the way in which you need to show up the way in which you are needing to support people or that you're being called, you know, the work that you're being called to do, you know, and so I feel like, we need to honor that and then evolve from that perspective. And so, you know, to me, it's, it's really more about having the authenticity and the clarity for you to be able to articulate that to people, you know, I do a lot of work with leadership now. And people are like, why are you doing that? You know, and to me, it's like, it's all in service of the same cause. You know, I, I incorporate intuition. I incorporate health and wellness, I incorporate high performance and for me, it's like when I get to work with teams, and I get to help. Entire teams begin to think about their experiences differently, begin to communicate with each other differently begin to motivate their employees from a place of empowerment, rather than a Place of blame and shame when you know, then all of those things, to me, it's contributing to the greater awakening, contributing to being able to lead with love rather than with fear, you know what I'm saying. And so, um, so for me, it's really about being so in tune with who you are, and your own personal evolution, and then being courageous enough to be able to talk about how you are evolving, and why you are choosing to do the things that you are choosing. Because I feel like one of the greatest one of the greatest problems that I have seen many entrepreneurs face, and that I've seen that happen for me is that you get stuck in your zone of excellence, you know, you get to be good at what you do. People recognize you for the work that you do. And then all of a sudden, you know, this is what you do, because you are excellent at it. But all of a sudden, that is keeping you away from actually inhabiting your zone of genius, you know, and I feel like, this has happened to me, it happened to me with like, working with eating disorders, I did it for so long. And people are like, You're amazing, blah, blah, blah. And I was like, but it got to a point where I was like, that's not where my heart is. And that's where my soul is calling me. And I need to do different work. And I need to be able to get out of doing that work. So I can do this other work, you know, and in some ways, a lot of times when we are very good and recognize and we have this excellence in something, we get stuck in it because there's a lot of fear and then leaving something behind to embrace something bigger that feels perhaps newer, and where you don't really have the recognition or the expertise or other people know you as that, you know, and and ultimately, I feel like our world is changing and evolving so quickly, that we need to be so in tune with ourselves listening to our intuition making those decisions really based on the guidance that we are receiving, so that we are staying in alignment with our highest soul's mission.

Well, I think you're right about the it's part of my next book that I'm putting out the topic around self love that starts with self love, and love in your heart and the expansion from your heart when you come from that vibration versus fear, which is constricting, and keeps you playing small and all the rest. Now, we know that you know you've taken courageous action. So have I, I have been committed, I'm confident and sometimes not confident. But I push through those barriers. And then you get to the other side, you think oh wasn't as bad as I thought sometimes. How does people like? What courageous actions can someone take in their own life to defy the ordinary and become extraordinary in their business and in their life? Like what's what are some of the courageous actions that you've seen with your clients? And that you would say to people listening today, what do they need to do to start really get developing their confidence stepping courageously into that next chapter, in their journey in their life?

So that's a fantastic question. And, of course, a really deep one. And, you know, we could probably have a whole course on this, but I'm going to start with with one of the basic ones. And so I'm going to start by saying that often, we expect a lot from ourselves in the short term, and not enough in the long term.

That's really good point to share and to honor that.

Right, exactly. And so we don't often think about how we dis dishonor ourselves, every time that we create an agreement with ourselves, and we break it. And so in the same way that you might lose trust in somebody that is not showing up for you, we lose trust, and we lose confidence in ourselves, every time that we don't show up for ourselves. And so, so I encourage people to really look honestly, to have a pretty honest look at their lives, and all of the ways in which they have let themselves down, to do some forgiveness around that, to have some grace and compassion around that. And then to choose one thing, that does not sound that does not seem, you know, impossible, but it actually feels doable. And commit to doing that one thing in a very consistent manner. Because if you can start building, trust in yourself and confidence in yourself, by taking this daily action, you begin to then start having that trust and that self reliance, you know.

I also think of commitments, when we're talking about commitments to our self, that they're not based on whatever somebody else wants you to do. You know, I big part of my tagline is create the life you love on your terms. Yes, and, and your tooth, your personal truth, because I think, the way that we're raised or whatever, you know, I think, again, if all of us at one time thought, Oh, I'm in, I'm in the in crowd, I'm in the out crowd, and all those comparisons and dividing us like, you know, dividing us in competition versus, you know, we're moving in with the Aquarian agent to collaboration and contribution, not competition. And remember, I was many years ago, when I used to do a lot of networking. My husband, I were at an event, and there was a lot of coaches there. And we all had our unique way of coaching, and our unique life stories. And one person came up to me and said, Well, how do any of you get clients? Because there's so many of you here, another thing? And my husband said to him, isn't it wonderful that there's all these different coaches out there unique story and that the person will be drawn to the person that's that's, you know, resonates with them? and How exciting is that? And when you come together from this place of abundance, and you're saying, like, we both know who we're going to look into collaboration, and in that power of coming together with a bigger vision, and holding that energy to manifest that.

Yeah,

I'm that I mean, and that's also coming from a place of abundance rather than scarcity. Right. So when we believe that we already are, and we already have the gifts and the skills, I think that this is part of the problem, right? Like we have, we're living on there, this illusion that we're separate that we, that we're flawed. And so we're, we're constantly looking and searching for what is wrong, rather than recognizing that we all have all these incredible unique gifts and abilities and unique life experience and no single person is has the kind of wisdom and perspective that you do. And so, we all have something very unique to contribute. And so when you start valuing it for yourself, I mean, I think that this is the other piece of when we start having the trust and the value in ourselves, then other people will value it, you know, because if you cannot appreciate and value yourself, you know, that energetically the universe will reflect that back to you. And then you will have experiences of other people not valuing and appreciating you. Right? And so when we learn to do that for ourselves, and Then what we're gonna draw in is other people valuing and appreciating that.

We know that what we expand, or what we put our focus on or talk about, we create more of that. So, yes, I know someone who is very busy in their life and says, I'd have no time I have no time. And this person does have a lot of things in their life, a lot of challenges. And, and really not very much time. But I said, No, stop saying that. Yeah, you if you segment out 15 minutes a day, for you to go have a nice cup of tea or something, or walk in the woods, just start incrementally doing that, and it will build and no, I had this last week, Elena, one of my upcoming guests, she wrote a beautiful book, and she sent it to me. And so I could read it before the interview and also dedicated in the very front of the book, and also enclosed a hand letter, like pen written, thank you, like, I just don't see hand written things. And I just sat there in so much, I felt so much gratitude. And my soul was so expansive. And I'm so thankful that, you know, the people that I'm meeting on this show and or coming back into my life like yourself, and it's just coming from that huge place of gratitude. And then miracles start happening all around you, it just start starts like, wow, this. And then there was other things that happened that day. And I was like, Wow, look at all those miracles happening and just being in so much gratitude. Because when you're in that place, yeah, it and really kind of start.

Yes 100% and I love that you share that story. Because it's very much in line with like, there's two things that I you know, to finish, the question that you asked, that I often encourage people to start with. One is to make a commitment to themselves, they get to choose whatever it is, and that they get to show up for it. You know, like when I did it, I did it with meditation. So it was a very simple, you know, I decided I've never done anything. And so I'm gonna commit to meditating every single day, even if it's just five minutes, like whatever that is. And I made that commitment. And it's been now like gosh, like seven years.

Wow, I'm into my third year seven.

Well yeah, and, but what it does is that it just builds that sense of confidence is so strongly right, and that connection to your intuition and your inner self. The next part that I often ask people to do is that I have them do an exercise where they write three things that they are grateful for, at the end of the day, and they cannot be the same things. They cannot be the same things. But that's it, you know, I said, it doesn't need to be a huge journal entry doesn't need to be if you want it to, you can but you know, I just want you to write three things. And usually, that in itself causes such an incredible shift and so many different gifts, because when we shift into a place of gratitude, we actually step into an energy of abundance, it also shifts our, it's a part of our brain that I call the retic, that it's called the reticular activating system that it's like a it's like a GPS signal system that basically tells your unconscious mind what to be paying attention to. And since we naturally have, these brains are like, Teflon for positive things and like Velcro for negative things, we need to be consciously working to reverse that process. And so when we say we're going to be writing down three things at the end of the day to be thankful for, then all of a sudden, your brain during the day now starts paying attention, like, Okay, well, what am I going to be paying attention to? So that I can say that I'm grateful for the next at the end of the day, right? But because now your brain is attuned to looking for what is great and magical, and wonderful, then you start experiencing more of those amazing, you know, magical moments, like, you know, like you getting that book and that card. And, you know, I got like a video message from a friend of mine, just telling me how much they appreciate me and how much they love me. And then I got a message from, like a client that I haven't seen in like two years about how much I've changed our lives. And, you know, and when that happens, you know, like to really take the time, like you said, to like, really feel that gratitude, you know, I often will like try to save them into another file that I call like my celebration journal, because to me, it's like, the more that we enhance these experiences, and the more that we get into the practice of enhancing these experiences, the more that we're building neural neural patterns in our brain and in our energy body, to be able to be creating and attracting more of that.

Also, that there's two questions when you were talking about that, that I've put down in my journaling, both Cliff and I are doing this every day. The two questions are, first of all, what are you passionate about? To focused on that your passions and there's the gratitude of writing three things idea, which is powerful. And what do I want to expand in my life? I love that question because as soon as I wrote that down, I started like just firing off, like no stops. And, and it's not figuring out that how you know the how is left to the universe.  It's just putting clearly what is it I want to experience because when we go into the how, and it has to happen this way, or it can't happen or whatever. It just stops it. (I agree).  And I've also learned mainly I'm saying with family, that it's very important, who you share your dreams with and what you want to create in your life versus someone jumping right in out of a habit that they might just have with their dialogue and they're not conscious, they're at a different level. You can't have that you can't do that. What would happen with that?

Yes versus just going for it, because like I knew when I had my television show that went to, I guess about five different areas, it was aired on and it was called "Success Breakthrough" and literally, I knew that show was going to go.  I knew this and I went  on to learn from somebody how to do the right up how to work from my photoshoot, like I learned how to do everything went to the studio, looked at editing, like I went and did the world. Yeah, but I knew it's going to happen. And it did. It's, and it's very much like right now my book, which I have to really dedicate time to go finish because I wanted to the new year is not like my mom, she's I love my mom, she's 93 She lives with us, and she has her own separate suite. But she'll say "What about your book working in your book" and I'm like, "no Mum" ~ my intention, you know, publish, but I'm doing this other things, and really catch myself even this might help some listeners today. Don't get into a dialogue of you know why it's not there. Just Yes, I'm working on it. Thank you, thank you for your love and your support, like cut it there don't don't get into explaining away because when you're explaining away that, again, shifts is you know, the energy there.

Well, and you bring a really interesting point. And I will say that just because for those listeners who are rebels out there, because I am such a huge rebel. And I have found that a you don't want to share about your dreams too soon. Because otherwise, you know, the naysayers might discourage you. But be a lot of times, like telling people what you're doing. can feel like it's taking away from your own energy. So like, you know, like your mom, totally loving and is trying to be super supportive, you know, and if I, and for me, like me, being a rebel is like the moment that somebody's asking me, if I'm doing something, then I'm like, I just want to rebel against it. I'm like, No, I'm not gonna do it. I don't want to do it. Because like, now somebody else is expecting me to do it. And so I don't want to do something that is somebody else's expecting me to do. You know, and so I often find that a lot of times, I don't say what I'm doing for that reason, because I want to feel like I am. And the creator of it, the creator of it, and then I'm doing it in my way of my own pace. And, and I don't want to feel that inner resistance that shows up for me when other people are like, Hey, are you doing or not doing? You know, and so I think that, again, like coming back to your own self awareness and self knowledge of who you are, and what's helpful to you. It's amazing, because sometimes having somebody that can ask, you can be really motivating, you know, and so if you're somebody that like no, having people supporting me, and asking me totally, like, gets me excited, and more likely for me to do it, then I use that. But if you're, you know, somebody that has a little bit of a rebellious tendency, like I do that, you know, if somebody asks you, then you're like, it'd be like, Don't ask me, I'm blah, blah, blah, you know, they don't say anything, you just go into your cave and do it, you know, and and see it as a and see it as a self commitment. Right? Like see it as I am committing this to myself, and I'm doing it for me and nobody else, right, which is part of building that unconditional love and building that unconditional trust in yourself that you can rely on yourself.

I know that Wayne Dyer who I really admire he, he talks very much with all the books that he wrote with and how we came through him that inspiration from spirit and spirit and how he wasn't really doing it for him necessarily. He got a lot of satisfaction from it, but he was really doing it for the bigger reason. And he did it just on his time and when he wanted to do stuff and he talks also about your your, your passions that it's a non negotiable you never, you know, sacrifice that for anybody, even your partner, your children. That's your passion and your purpose. And once it's put there, it's put there for a desire for you to create that you're you already have the magic Within is just discovering that 100%. Now you you work with a lot of highly successful people, what patterns Do you recognize in them? And what's the link between intuition and success for them? I'm so big questions today.

Totally.

So what patterns? You know, there's lots of them, but I'm gonna speak to two of them that I see. Thank you.

So one of the patterns that I see is this belief of, I'm not good enough. And it's interesting, because while that belief could show up as somebody actually not performing, and not achieving, it is a certain type of people, you know, and I think that, you know, I cannot talk a little bit about being a rebel. And I think that many of the highly successful people have this combination of having this sense of disbelief of not being good enough, but also having a very strong rebellious, you know, I'm going to show you kind of response to it. And so they become successful in their effort to prove to others and to prove to themselves that they are, in fact, good enough. And so, they embark on this process of seeking achievement and recognition, or, and while some of it is, you know, coming from a good place, there is an unconscious drive, that it's driving them to feel like they are finally good enough, or to have the recognition from other people, and to feel good enough, and so on. And so I find that they're constantly pushing themselves to do more, to want to achieve more, because they're, it's driven by this one. And then when they recognize that that's actually what's happening, then it's also difficult for them to want to heal it because it has created success, right. And so they, they worry that if they actually are able to heal it and get to a place where they finally feel good enough, that they will lose their energy and their motivation, to want to keep achieving and the way that they have. But consequently, because of that, they tend to drive themselves very hard, they tend to judge themselves pretty harshly and tend to fall into patterns of burnout and or, you know, letting go of their health or that kind of thing. And so, there's always a lot of work on trying to find balance, you know, like rebalancing, because often they are too out of balance, and they're trying to achieve trying to do and, and so their relationships fall out of balance or health falls out of balance, you know, their self care, their joyful pursuits fall out of balance. And so the the link, and how you know, why intuition then matters is that, often, they tend to be a little disconnected, not entirely, but from their intuition. They use it often, to drive many of the decisions that they do for their performance, or their work or their business. But they're a little bit more disconnected, or they just hear it, but don't listen to it, right. Like they don't heed it's prompting to, to take care of themselves or their relationships. And so part of helping them get reconnected and re embodied with their intuition is in and it's, it's an attempt to help them find actually a more balanced approach to success, so that they are now actually being led by intuition by being motivated by what they want to create, rather than what they want to avoid or prove that they are, you know, good enough, but rather more like how do I know attuned to what I really want to create in my life, how do what I want to create in my world, and to be able to start really getting fine tuned on each one of the types of intuition so that they know how to respond and they know what kind of decisions they need to take and, and the timing of those decisions. Because I think that when somebody is very high performing, they also put a lot of pressure on themselves. And eventually when you are performing consistently very highly, other people put pressure on you because they expect that you will be showing up in a certain way. And so as you start connecting to your intuition, and then paying attention to, when do you say yes to things? And when do you say no to things? What sorts of things do you let go of your life and what sorts of things you bring into your life, then you also, you know, we start having a conversation about creating boundaries, and then how to enforce those boundaries in in a loving way. And in a way that is totally aligned with your truth with your intuition. And in a respectful way for other people. So those are kind of the bigger.

I know that I created a workshop I used to do years ago about "Creating Healthy Boundaries" and learning how to say, Yes, like you said, when that's appropriate for yourself and saying no. And sometimes when we're saying no to somebody that it's not always personal. It's just a good decision, maybe for your business or in your life. And it's important to get very comfortable doing that. Now. Yeah, I know, a lot of people have a wound around money. And, and even I know that when I began, I'm an entrepreneur now for over 30 years. So when I began in the world of healing, and amazing, yes. healing and all the work that I did back then, and all the modalities I learned in all the investments, which were important to me, because I wanted to always be more to my clients. But the idea even as a healer, you know, I had it at the beginning about asking for money for this healing, you know, no, there shouldn't be money, right? I just want to do my healing somebody else at the front desk or something can, you know, get the money, but if there was a wound to heal around till I learned that intrigued me many years to learn that. And, you know, what would you say like, you know, expand on because we're, we're magnifiers like we are, you know, it's in us already of who we are, if we can tap into that. So how do you how would you help someone, just another one, I know, it could be a whole conversation, but to start to heal the wound around money, because I think it's a big one out there.

So the question is, how do you begin to heal the money? 

The Money Wound.

Yeah, so I'm going to say this, right. Now, before I answer your question, because I'm going to forget after,

okay,

yes,

just you your question just prompted me business. So when we give people links for you know, guests, and that kind of thing, I think that we need to give a link and try to find it to that chapter, that book chapter that I wrote on. It's a chapter that I called "Alchemy of Love".

I read it, "Alchemy of Love: Find the Key to Keeping your Bank Account Flowing, Your Body Glowing and your Business Growing" and it's a beautiful article, lots of good things in there. So yes, we can.

Yeah, that because I think that that just kind of links these two conversations, yes. And, and so. So I believe that at the core, our money, wounds and our scarcity wounds, come back to self love. And, and our capacity to receive. And so when we do not love ourselves enough on we are uncomfortable with receiving, then it makes it really challenging for you to then be able to have conversations about money, and charging whatever it is that you want to charge for your services or your programs.

So that ultimately it has to do with with self love, and your, your capacity to receive. And so for me is where you would start is one recognizing that, you know, my perspective is that is that money is simply like you said a magnifier and, and that what we do and charging for things, it's simply a green energy exchange, right? So we are exchanging energy in terms of we are providing a service or a product or a class or whatever it is that we're doing. And then we are getting in exchange a different you know, a different energy that's going to allow us to pay our bills and you know, put food on the table, etc, etc. And so, it is just a it's just a simple trade, you know, I like to think back to why, where money originated. And it was simply to create an easy way for us to be able to do trades, because, you know, we used to trade chickens for rice and, you know, but we can't be running around with like, you know, crates of chickens and bags of rice and you know, that kind of thing.  

Right? Like, that's how it all started. And so we were like, Hey, we need to come up with some kind of system that allows us to actually, you know, barter In a way, that seems a little easier than, and so you know, so I like to kind of remember that about money, but to do then to start looking at all of the ways in which you are not allowing yourself to receive within your own experience within your own life, I find that with abundance. And so I like to look at at abundance, not just in terms of money, but in terms of our health in terms of all of the ways in which we give ourselves love. And we tend to become very comfortable with things being not great. You know, there's a lot of people that are living in VCs, and, and they feel like, well, this is normal. And so we're just going to put up with these symptoms, because this is normal. Instead of recognizing like, no, I shouldn't be having headaches every single day, I should have body pains every single day, I need to get to the bottom of this, and I need to get back to feeling really vibrant. And really, do you see what I'm saying? And so like I would even look at, because we all do it? You know I am I want to say that I'm coming and sharing some of the stuff not because like I have it all figured out. But because i've you know, have to struggle and struggle through and I think that it's something that we're constantly working on, because we create those limits, right? Like we all create a certain level in which we get comfortable. And then that becomes our new ceiling. And so we're constantly having to challenge ourselves in these things. But I would like look around in your house, like what are the ways in which you are disrespecting yourself and not giving yourself enough? Right? 

I think it's also it's not like you said it's your physical, mental, emotional, financial, it's all the all the different areas. But it's also, you know, if somebody gives you a compliment, and you're like, No, no, no, this is an old shirt. No, no, no, or you bake something and somebody says, No, that's not my best meal. Like you have that versus Thank you.

Exactly. Right. Like, it's like, this is also beautiful, oh, but look at all the things that are not really right. And it can be better. And so for me, it's like, it is a balance. Yes, it's good that you recognize and you're aspiring for, for excellence. And I'm the first one to encourage that. But I think it's being able to really accept to really accept that compliment and be like, thank you that you see that. Thank you, you know, and so look around your house and see, you know, I was I was seeing like, Oh, I have like this Brock broken faucet, and I haven't fixed it. Or, you know, I have this, you know, I don't know, like this old, like this old rag in the kitchen. Why don't I just throw it away and get a new one? And do you see what I'm saying? So even like little ways and little things that you do and that you have in your environment that you kind of put up with that you feel like it's okay. Instead of you being like, Why? Because if somebody if if the Dalai Lama was coming over to your house, or you know, to your office or, you know, what would you change? How would you make it look or be so that you would like honor that person that you really admire and respect? And I think about that often? And why don't we? Why don't we do it for ourselves? Right? And so I think that it needs to start even with little things like that, how can you create an experience of luxury and abundance for yourself and then be comfortable with it, because that's the other piece, right? that a lot of times even we get an opportunity to have an experience of luxury, and then we're so uncomfortable with it. And we're like constantly like we're like, oh, I shouldn't be blah, blah, blah, because somebody else doesn't have this, and I can't really have this and then all of a sudden you're in so much anxiety and resisting so much instead of being able to be like in gratitude, and really appreciating the fact that you had this opportunity to experience luxury in that moment. And to experience abundance in that moment, and to really take it in and allow it to seep into your body and be like yeah, like everybody deserves to be feeling this, how can I anchor this into my body and my physiology and then bring it into my life and then be able to provide it for other people?

Yes. And I think you and I could go on for hours. So I just want to say that those links to your gifts, the Pathways to Clarity" about intuition, you have some other gifts that are going to be below this episode. Also that link to that chapter, we're going to add the "Alchemy of Love: Find the Key to Keeping your Bank Account Flowing" and the link to you so people want to reach out to that will be below the show notes.   Iwant to thank you so much for sharing from your heart and your soul. Your wisdom today on how to really Defy the Ordinary and Become Extraordinary in your business and in your life. Namaste.

Thank you ~ Thank you so much. Such an honor Moira.